A "Discreet" Relationship

So, I met this really cute older Asian man named Samuel online. Keep in mind that HE contacted me (because I'm so darned sexy and cute). He's a retired physician, not really the age group I like (he's my age, ha-ha!), but he was kinda cute.

Cute, until he sent the third e-mail that stated: "I really like you. You are the only black woman that's ever responded to me. Let's get together and have a "discreet" relationship". When I read that, the eyebrows went up and the mouth curled down! WTF, I thought, does he mean about a "discreet" relationship? He said he was widowed, so is there a girlfriend that he wants to "creep" on? A boyfriend? Silly ol' me didn't think, right away, that he'd dare imply that my ebony complexion was the source of his angst. After all, there my picture was in all it's African glory, my dark brown face staring out from his screen and he still e-mailed me. So, when I finally respond, he says some ish like that? Now, wait a damned minute, let's straighten this crooked crap out!

I got a message from a cowboy in Missouri, Wyoming some place like that (who cares?) when an IM pops up from Samuel that I accept. He starts off by asking if I remember him. Of course, I respond, I just read your message two days ago. Hell I ain't senile!

Well, he types, why haven't you answered my question about us getting together? Oh, I type back, you mean about the clandestine meeting under the cover of darkness that you identify as "discreet"? Well, he responds, we must be discreet because we are: (drum roll...) different races. Oh no, this mofo didn't, I thought!

I began typing so fast I had a typo every other word! lol I told him that I, as an independent, mature woman of color had dated lots of men of other races. ANY man that wanted the pleasure of my company had to be proud to be seen with me anytime, anyplace and if not, he could kiss my black ass! He typed back: "ok, bye". Damn, what was he smokin'?

The unmitigated gall of that fuckin' retard reject! Are men really that damned stupid? Go to an escort service fool if you just want a piece of "discreet" black ass! I ain't nobody's "booty call" and I sure didn't put that on my profile under "My Hobbies and Interests"! Boy, that's why I don't like older men. This fool contacted the wrong sista and I see why no black women answered him. I would have to be the only one and get my feathers ruffeled. All I can say is that I'm glad he wasn't saying that nonsense on the phone or else I would have gone totally postal on his short, retired ass! "Sapphire" would have busted out because she's my alter ego just for pond scum like him!

I reiterate, that's why I like men younger than me. All these old fools with old hang ups! Always want to do things undercover. They know they like black booty but if they're so afraid of what someone else will think, suffer without!

Smoke Gets In Your Eyes (and lungs, heart, etc)

I'm really astonished at how many Asian men smoke. In particular, Japanese men, who I think are the sexiest, seem to never be without a "cancer stick". Didn't they get the memo about the health risks of smoking? To make matters worse, I hear that Japan promotes smoking. Come on - that's taking it way too far! Doesn't the Japanese Health Ministry, or whatever it's called, let the populace know that this habit is life threatening/deadly? The Japanese are a fast forward, educated race of people. What don't they understand about this?

I saw a group of really cute Japanese tourists standing in front of PetSmart the other day. YES, I knew they were Japanese by their look. I can tell one Asian from another. Koreans look different from Japanese and Chinese look different from Koreans. I've studied this long and hard! lol Anyway, I'm coming out the doors with my cart of kitty litter and Fancy Feast and see these cutie-pies outside speaking in Japanese. I put on my best "Hot Mama Switch" and just as I get ready to say "Hi" in my sugary sweet voice, they all light up! What a bummer! They were all attractive BEFORE they stuck that thing in their mouths but afterwards, they all looked gross! Smoking is one thing I just won't compromise on. Not only does it look sickening, it smells awful and is bad for your health. WHAT is the allure to start with?

I can't even begin to think about getting romantic with a man who smokes. It's a total turn-off. Yet, I see soooo many Asian men puffing on those cancer sticks until it's depressing. They have their diet "down", what about this smoking thing?

I don't know why I should be so surprised. Americans have much more information about the health hazards of smoking thrown at them regularly and yet, large numbers of us still smoke. Having never smoked, I can't stand to even smell it, much less put something that gross in my mouth, inhale it into my body and then, go to the gym and exercise. What is that? I see so many guys at work do that. There must be a disconnect in their brains.

Oh well, maybe I will find that one-in-a-hundred Asian man that doesn't smoke and we can kiss until we pass out! lol

Money, Japan, Frustration!

I've been so lax about keeping up with this blog because my life has gotten so dreadfully busy this year. I don't know how people find the time to blog every day. I don't, literally, have time to do the "necessities of life", (go potty, etc) because there just aren't enough hours in the damned day! When I get home, I'm exhausted and then, it's time to hit the bed. Sigh..

My daughter is going to D.C. next month for a week with her class to study, "American History & Government". Why can't you do that in school, HERE ?, I wanted to know. She gave me her typical eye rolling, teeth sucking alter ego and calmly told me she didn't want to be the ONLY one not going. Oh, ok, so because you want to save face, I have to spring for a twenty-two hundred dollar trip so your behind can learn something across country that I'm paying those people in that private school to teach you anyway? I told her that if I'd known she was going to be such a pain in the ass, I'd have put her up for adoption! Yeah, right!, was her reply. Oh, well, I guess it's true when they say you get what you deserve. The joys of single parenthood.

On top of junior's demand for her trip to D.C. with new luggage mind you, plus lots of spending money for food and souvenirs, I'm having all kinds of problems trying to get my passport updated to go to Japan this August. Roadblocks everywhere and I may just wait until 2010. I can't, as Tina says, stand the rain! I'm tired of this red-tape BS and my so-called traveling companion changing her mind, to and fro, fro and to - make a damned decision! One thing I hate is adults with neither chick nor child who can't decide if they're going to do something! I'm just too big of a chicken to go that far alone. I always think about an emergency arising and there I'd be, a poor, helpless middle aged black woman with no help! Well, over exaggeration, but you know...

Getting sick or stranded in Asia is not on my list of things I want to do (although, if it's stranded with a hot Japanese guy....). Anyway, my "iffy" traveling companion, who's an attorney, single, no kids, makes good money (a lot longer than mine), is dragging her ass about going, after she said she would. What's up with that? Before I'd make a commitment like that, I'd think it over carefully, carefully! She'd better be glad I didn't spring for my airline ticket with her having all these "doubts" now. Can you say 187?

I've put out so much money this year. In January, all four of my cats came down with scabies. Those are the ugliest little beasts you'd ever want to see!!! I first noticed the kitten's ear was scratched raw one morning. I rushed her to the vet where I was calmly informed, after a scraping, that she had scabies. "WHAT?", I yelled at Dr. Kamal. "I thought only outside and shelter cats got scabies! All my cats are strictly indoor cats. How can this happen"? He proceeded to show me under the microscope and I almost fainted seeing those awful beasties crawling around on my beautiful kitten's head! Gross!!! Dr. Kamal said there must be a sick cat around the neighborhood. Sure enough, animal lover that I am, I used to (used to), sit a dish of dry food and clean water on my front stoop for the "feline community" on my street. I noticed one day that a rather, mangy, sickly looking cat was eating on the stoop and realized HE was the culprit! Poor thing was a pitiful sight and my cats, who patrol the screen door meowing and snarling at any cat that comes up on their stoop, fell victim. All it took was for one to get it and it was on! I have one girl and three boys who wrestle, bite and groom each other constantly. It had to happen.

So, she had to be quarantined for a month with weekly "lime dip" baths. Now, you know the worst, right? It had spread to my other three cats and all of them had to have those stinking baths and be quarantined! I felt like crap locking them behind a bedroom door for 4 weeks but I had to do it. My vet, one of the nicest people you'll ever meet, gave me huge discounts but I still ended up paying him a small mint. Plus, the cats scratched the hell outta my carpet near the door, poor dears, wanting out. For pets who generally had the run of the house, they did NOT like being confined. But, they got used to it and accepted their fate, poor babes.

Then, I guess I love pain because I went and brought a new car. I'd had a bad accident in my G35 last April and every time I looked at that thang, I thought about that illegal bustin' the hell outta my car to the tune of almost 8k, dislocating 2 of my upper ribs in the front and not stopping!!! Add to that the hell I went thru with Allstate and I was done! So, the G35 had to go. Too many bad memories and let's face it, anytime a car has had a hard impact like that, it never runs the same. Time to move on.

So, Tokyo, I hope I get to see you this year and, if not, I know you'll be there. Money, I make it and I sure as hell spend it. Now, all I'm waiting for is the roof to leak or one of the major appliances to go on the blink. Sigh....